It's day 5 of rainy weather here in Chico, and I've enjoyed spending much of the last few days curled up indoors.
My mom was in town, which was fun, and we were able to do some of my favorite, low-key things, including:
- savor a pumpkin spice latte from Bidwell Perk
- adventure up the Yahi trail to Bear Hole in Bidwell Park (with Kai leading the way the entire time)
- smell up the house with a freshly-made apple crisp
- cheer on our favorite football teams from the comfort of the couch, and
- listen to the stormy wind and rain outside
Mostly, it was refreshing to be without any agenda or schedule for a few days.
For much of my past, I've been the kind of person that had a hard time sitting still. I always wanted to be productive, to make the most of every moment--sometimes at the detriment of my own well-being.
It wasn't until I really started looking at my own energy fluctuations, that I granted myself the permission to relax.
While I'm very comfortable now with the idea of letting my physical body rest, there is a side of me that wants to take a similar attitude of pushing, of forcing, of constant action with the ideas that pop into my head.
As Steve would readily tell you, I start squirming in bed by 4:30 am, and I'm up by 5. At this point, my mind is already racing with things on my to-do list, inspirations for writing, calls to make, and possibilities to entertain. I really have to put this instant rush of info on hold to meditate, and create some clarity for myself right out of the early-morning gate.
That being said, I'm always full of ideas, and I often feel a sense of urgency to put these ideas into action.
However, I know that rushing to manifest anything can be contrary to my overall goal of receiving it.
I know that when I want things to happen right now, I'm introducing a sense of resistance into the equation.
The perfect example of this was how I responded to my golf game last week.
I have the idea that I can be a great golfer. I've had positive feedback thus far with my success on the course. I've read books about the mental game, and I'm taking lessons to improve my skill set.
The truth is, I want to be that great golfer right now. I want all of the components of my game--long, short, and putting--to come together so effortlessly that my score continues to drop at a rapid rate.
Now, if any of you have golfed at some point in time, you're probably laughing at me right now. Golf is a life-long game that requires ongoing learning.
And, when my shots were poor and my score was high at Yocha Dehe last week, I was devastated. (That, and I was unnecessarily frustrated through half of the round).
In my rush to be the best right now (in golf, and in any other area of life), I know I'm missing out on the learning process. In my expectations of where I should be, I'm resisting where I'm at.
And, when I resist where I'm at, I almost make it impossible to improve.
This is the same with my ideas.
In wanting them to all flesh out now, to actualize now, I'm limiting the capacity for them to be as great as they could be.
Today, I'm reminded that taking the slower path for my mind (like a weekend of relaxation indoors for my body) can be just what I need to add momentum to my ideas.
Today, I'm going to let my ideas marinate a little bit longer. I'm going to write about them, daydream about them, and revel in the good that comes from just thinking about them.
I'm going to continue to let the momentum of my ideas build internally until the power to act is so great that I can't help but do so.
Just like your body knows the right time to get up and move after being cooped up indoors, our mind and heart know just the right time to take action on those ideas.
It just takes the courage to wait, trust, and listen.